HomeVOLUME 8August 2023 Finding purpose

KAJ HAMMARGREN is an athlete who turned his life around from a very dark place in his twenties to serving others and bringing joy, thanks to a spiritual awakening and the practice of meditation. His story is an inspiring one!

I shouldn’t be able to run, not even walk, and especially not pole vault. In fact, I shouldn’t be alive at all. 

I was born in Copenhagen in 1964 and I was good at sport. I became one of the biggest talents in Denmark in the pole vault. But I also struggled with alcohol, and those two things didn’t match at all. Alcohol became my master for some years, and it almost ended my life in a traffic accident at the age of 27. I wanted to die. 

But then I had a spiritual awakening, and meditation became central to my life. I have practiced Heartfulness meditation for more than 20 years. 

At the age of 51, I was asked to start jumping again, just for fun, at my old club. That’s eight years ago. The first few years I had fun, competing for the club with all my old friends. But last year, my weight was more than 100 kg and I decided to lose 15 kgs, start training two to three times a week, and participate in the world championships 2023 in Gothenburg. I also decided to have surgery on my right knee, so I could jump without pain. 

It’s easy to lose weight. I only eat what is necessary most days during the week, and some days I fast until the evening. I ask myself, “Is it necessary to eat this?” and then I don’t. One or two days a week I eat normally. I lost 13 kgs the first year, so I was close to the optimal weight for my height. I think previously I was attached to eating too much, and not always the right stuff. Of course, I did not eat well every day, but many days I did. And I became grateful for being able do it, including fasting for more than 16 hours a day. 

But what about other attachments? Am I attached to becoming the world champion in pole vaulting? Well, I’m not, but I am interested in experiencing what happens when I meditate and pole vault. So that’s what I’ve been doing. It’s not only important to jump, but it’s even more important how I participate. Babuji mentioned that we need to be of service, so I’m trying to be helpful to everyone who is jumping. In fact I pray in the morning, “How can I be useful?” and I ask God what His plan is for me.  

As a result, I am not afraid during competitions, and I’m more relaxed and focused. Also, I don’t waste energy being afraid, envying others, so a lot of good stuff happens, especially making new friends. 

I recently participated in the Championship of the Nordic Countries and won. I also made several new friends, but during the competition I noticed a man running on the track who was dying. I followed him, then shouted and waved my hands to the officials, and called for an ambulance. Quickly a doctor came running with a heart starter, but I saw the man’s blue face and instantly knew he was dying. I sat down with my head in my hands and started to pray for his life. After a while I looked up, and he was awake and sitting on the track. 

My goal is to participate in the World Championships in 2025. But I also know that life is meant to be joyful, and it’s important for me to find out what God’s plan is for me. I do not want to only reach for gold for myself, and I don’t need to be the best. I do, however, need to reach out for the best way of living a spiritual life. 

Earlier, I would have been satisfied with my current achievements. And fear was part of jumping, limiting my progress: fear of winning, failing, what others thought of me, etc. I was attached to the goal of being the best, so that people would think I was a good man. It was a big dream, an illusion. 

Now I have a spiritual goal, to live right here, right now, in constant rememberance of His presence in everything I do. Whether I win or lose, my life is fullfilled while doing it – I have experienced it in all my affairs. It is experiencing life on another level.

 


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Kaj Hammargren

Kaj Hammargren

Kaj is a schoolteacher, coach, and prize-winning athlete. He has meditated for 20 years and is a member of the Heartfulness Institute in Copenhagen, Denmark.

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